Pumpkin Exercises

I didn't get to try these exercises this year because I didn't get any pumpkins for Halloween - maybe next year.

Exercising With Pumpkins?

Wow! In honor of Halloween I am posting these videos showing exercises that can be done with pumpkins. I never knew...

10 Killer Pumpkin Exercises Session 2 - These bloopers are hilarious

Is Obesity and Child Abuse Related?

So I tried to do some research on if obesity correlates with incidence of molestation. I wasn’t able to find much but I did find two peer reviewed journal articles that were interesting. I was thinking about doing research of my own on it for my Advanced Research and Writing in Psychology class (it would be surveys) but my professor said that as an undergrad, it might be too harmful to ask the questions I would need to. That sucks but I kind of figured she would say that. I will have to save that research for grad school.

The first article I found is “Association of Perceived Neighborhood Safety on Body Mass Index” by Jason S. Fish, et al. It was published in the American Journal of Public Health. The researcher took information from a survey already being administered in Los Angeles and also 2000 Census data. They took BMI information of the participants and also looked at what they answered when asked about the safety of their neighborhoods. Crime data and income data was also analyzed. The results of the study were that individuals that perceived their neighborhoods as unsafe had a higher BMI than those who did not. I can relate this to my hypothesis (or my situation) – imagine someone who is molested by a neighbor, friend of the family, household member, or a family member. How safe do you think they feel?

This data is just co-relational (correlation does not mean causation!) and is also self-report data so it is by no meat definitive but it is a start and something to investigate further.

Link to the article:

http://ajph.aphapublications.org/cgi/content/abstract/100/11/2296

The second article I found is “Body Weight and Obesity in Adults and Self-Reported Abuse in Childhood” by D.F. Williamson, et al. It was published in International Journal of Obesity, @ www.nature.com/ijo

The researchers took participants weight during a clinical examination and then later mailed a survey to them asking about their experiences during the first 18 years of their life. The researchers found that abuse in childhood (most strongly physical and verbal)is associated with obesity in adults. This article deals with sexual abuse as physical abuse. I found this study very interesting. Again the data is self-report data and is co-relational so more work needs to be done with the findings; more research needs to be done but it proves to me that I may have something in thinking my obesity may in some part be due to the fact I was molested in childhood.

Link:

http://www.nature.com/ijo/journal/v26/n8/full/0802038a.html

Working Out Update: Why Ain't I Proud of Myself.

Three weeks in! I have been working out at the gym for three weeks. That is pretty good. My counselor keeps asking me if I am proud of myself. I guess I am but I keep waiting for me to mess up and quit going. Every day it is a struggle. I suppose she wants me to jump up and shout, pound my chest with pride. I don’t feel that wonderful yet. I am pretty hard on myself (the depression causes a lot of negative thinking and blunts a lot of my good feelings). I won’t really feel that much pride over working out until I start seeing and feeling some results. Big results. I feel somewhat different – more compact. My muscles are getting stronger and tighter. That is a good thing, yet I don’t feel much pride. I don’t feel much energy yet either. I will feel a short burst after working out but I need the energy to last me the whole day through and into evening.

Perhaps I need to kick it up a notch. I am having a hard time balancing my work load this semester so I don’t think I can squeeze anymore exercise time in. I really need to address my eating. It is just easier to grab quick food, easy food, fast food, junk food rather than plan and make healthier meals. I am going to have to get around to tackling that one of these days. I haven’t been eating as much as I used to though, and I have been eating my big meals closer to midday rather than in the evening. I usually just crash in the evening when I get home. That is why I need more energy! So I can study and perhaps pack a healthy lunch for the next day.

Anxiety – that is another bear. I usually enjoy exercising at the gym once I get there but the getting there is tough because I think of all the other things I should be doing. Sometimes it is hard to shut that anxiety down while I am exercising too. I have to keep pushing myself to get in a good workout. It is a battle and most days I am tired, anxious, scattered and battle scarred. I fight myself but I am committed to exercising. MUST   GET   HEALTHY!!

Slicing Air

Today my workout partner and I decided to treat ourselves and do something fun – we played racquetball. Or I should say we tried to play racquetball. I have never played before but I was excited to try. It was fun but I am not sure how much of a work out we got. First of neither of us were sure of the rules. Second of all we couldn’t keep the ball moving, it would seem to stall in a corner. When we did get the ball moving, we were sort of afraid of it because it comes at you fast. Then there were times when I was just slicing the air with my racquet. My hand to eye coordination is not the greatest. I know I had to look pretty damn silly! SO needless to say we sucked. But it we had fun and hey, we tried. We did work up a sweat and our bellies hurt because we were laughing so hard at our ineptitude. It was exhausting - I need to be in better shape. I would like to try again but I will need to look over the rules.

I did miss working out with the weights. We didn’t do that today because we were short on time. I felt a little guilty but I am sure I will get over it.

***

http://www.usra.org/Rulebook.aspx

Who knew racquetball was so complicated? I looked up the rules of racquetball and boy are they confusing! I don't think I am up for all that mess. When we try again I guess we could just work on keeping the ball moving and not being afraid of it.

Impulsivity and Obesity

This semester I am taking a class called Advanced Research and Writing in Psychology. I am in a group working on the topic of obesity. I love it when classes overlap =) I am learing a lot about obesity and how the overeating is like an addiciton, how overweight and obese individuals show the same personality traits, brain changes and behaviors as someone who is addicted to drugs.

We have to come up with a research question and write a research proposal dealing with impulsivity and obesity. Here is part of the introduction to the research proposal that I wrote with some of my notes on the research articles after. My intro needs work and it is hard because it can only be 4 pages, plus there are 4 other people in my group who have research and writing to add to it also.  Our research question has to do with the interaction of media advertising and impulsivity - is there an interaction and is this more likely to effect the overweight?

***

             Obesity is a major health problem in the United States and is fast becoming a global problem. According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), one third of all adults in the United States and approximately 17% of children are obese. World Health Organization statistics indicate that approximately 24% of the world population is overweight or obese. “Once considered a problem only in high-income countries, overweight and obesity are now dramatically on the rise in low- and middle-income countries, particularly in urban settings.” (WHO, 2010)

            The costs of obesity are staggering because of the chronic diseases and disabilities associated with an overweight and obese population such as cardiovascular disease, hypertension, diabetes, osteoarthritis (and other musculoskeletal disorders, and even some cancers. Nationally, overweight and obesity direct and indirect health care costs are estimated anywhere from $73 billion to $96 billion annually, with over half of the cost being paid by federal and state governments through Medicare and Medicaid (CDC, 2010). A recent CNN.com article about the First Lady Michelle Obama’s campaign against childhood obesity reports the costs are as high as $147 billion annually (CNN, 2010).

            It is easy to determine the negative effects of obesity but not as easy to determine the causes. Obviously overeating and under activity plays a role in most overweight and obese cases but what are the underlying causes? According to Dr. C. Davis in her article Psychobiological traits in the risk profile for overeating and weight gain, the scientific community in increasingly acknowledging that overweight and obese individuals share certain traits with drug addicts because overeating and drug use share the same reward mechanisms or pathway in the brain. (Davis, 2009) In her article she explores these traits – reward sensitivity (on both end of the spectrum), impulsivity, and attention deficit/hyperactivity. Impulsivity in overweight and obese individuals is especially interesting because of its prominence in most addictive behaviors - much research that has been done on addiction highlights the role of impulsivity in people who suffer with drug addiction. Researchers who study obesity find addiction studies relevant because of shared traits and reward mechanisms in the brain between someone who overeats (and overeating leads to obesity) and someone addicted to drugs.

            In addition to internal influences or personality traits such as impulsivity, the media and marketers play a role major role in the increase of overweight or obese individuals. Deborah A. Cohen explores ten human characteristics that make people overeat in her article Neurophysiological Pathways to Obesity: Below Awareness and Beyond Individual Control. Among these characteristics are: physiological reflexive response to food and images of food; mirror neurons that lead people to mimic the behavior of other humans often, without awareness; conditioned responses that result in desire for food when confronted with food-related cues; automatic responses to priming – association with products or ‘branding’, recognition of brands and symbols enhancing food items; limited cognitive capacity and self-regulatory control – too often leads to impulsivity when confronted with too much information. (Cohen, 2008) These characteristics or pathways illustrate what huge role advertising and the media play in the underlying causes of obesity.

REFERENCES/NOTES:

Psychobiological traits in the risk profile for overeating and weight gain

C. Davis

International Journal of Obesity (2009) 33, pages S49 – S53

This article looks at psychobiological traits that may promote overeating and obesity. The traits highlighted were reward sensitivity, impulsivity, and ADHD. Great definitions of impulsivity – breaks into 2 types.

This is not a research article, it is a review. The major point of this article is that obesity is not a ‘uniform condition’ but has many causes. There must be a shift in research which looks at individual risk factors and variables. On the bright side, there has been increasing focus in obesity research to looking at psychological traits and motivational systems that contribute to overeating.

Neurophysiological Pathways to Obesity: Below Awareness and Beyond Individual Control

Deborah A. Cohen

Diabetes, Vol. 57, July 2008 pages 1768-1773

“Could the increases in food availability, food salience, and the sophistication of modern marketing explain the obesity epidemic?” The article attempts to highlight the neurophysiological aspect of obesity, overeating, and control.

This is not a research article, it reviews “the interaction between food and environment and human neurophysiology to provide some initial evidence that, to a large extent, obesity is the consequence of automatic and largely uncontrollable response to an environment with excessive food availability and aggressive and unrelenting cues that cause people to eat too much.” What is the definition of impulsivity again? Ha. Good tie in to the media aspect. The article highlights ten possible neurophysiological  pathways to overeating or obesity and has a handy chart. The pathways that most concern us are:

1)      Psysiological reflexive response to food and images of food

6)    mirror neurons that lead people to mimic the behavior of other humans often, without awareness

8)    conditioned responses that result in desire for food when confronted with food-related cues

9)    automatic responses to priming

10) limited cognitive capacity and self-regulatory control – goes to impulsivity when confronted with too much information

Prevention of obesity and eating disorders: a consideration of shared risk factors

Jess Haines and Dianne Neumark- Sztainer

Health Education Research Theory and Practice, Vol. 21 no. 6 2006 pages 770-82

September 8 2006

The article addresses shared risk factors of obesity and eating disorders.  “The aim of this paper is to identify and explore the evidence for factors of potential relevance for obesity and eating disorders that could serve as focal points for integrated prevention interventions.”

Major findings – This is not a research article. It is a review of risk factors for obesity and eating disorders and focuses on shared risk factors. Risk factors explored are dieting, media, body dissatisfaction, and weight related teasing.
***

I want to explore these articles further, plus the works they cited. After this group project I have to come up with my own research proposal so I will be learning a lot about obesity. I hope it will help me with my own struggles with weight.

English 252 Essay 2

Here is my review for class. I had trouble posting it for some reason so please excuse any formatting issues.

Essay 2

The Town: A Movie Review

The Basics

            “The Town” is a solidly entertaining movie with a little something for everyone – romance, intrigue, suspense, but most of all action scenes and car chases. “The Town” is based on the 2004 novel, “Prince of Thieves” by Chuck Hogan and was co-written, directed and also starring Ben Affleck. The movie is getting buzz as Affleck’s comeback as filmmaker after a run of unmemorable performances and a few flops.

The Story

“There are over 300 bank robberies in Boston every year. And a one square mile neighborhood in Boston, called Charlestown, has produced more bank and armored car robbers than anywhere in the U.S.” http://thetownmovie.warnerbros.com

That quote sums up the basic premise of the movie. Charlestown, a rough, working class neighborhood north of Boston, characterizes the gang of bank robbers led by Doug MacRay (played by Affleck) and the environment they live in. From the beginning of the movie you are thrown in with this masked band of ‘thieves’ as they rob a bank. This is obviously not their first bank robbery - they are serious about their work, quickly and confidently taking over a bank and ruthlessly demanding that someone open the safe. It is that scene we are introduced to Claire Keesey (Rebecca Hall), the bank manager who opens the safe and is subsequently kidnapped by the gang. They let her go as soon as they are safely away but keep her driver’s license. Things get complicated when one of the gang members, the violent Jem (Jeremy Renner) wants to harm Claire to assure that she keeps quiet about anything she may have seen or heard when they held her captive. Doug steps up to handle it and ends up befriending Claire. Let me just say things progress from there, so I don’t give much of the movie away.

The Performances

Truthfully there are no standout performances in “The Town”. All the actors did a good job with their roles. The highlighting of the town and its roughness was used to sketch out all the characters of the gang. Ben Affleck was comfortable as the relatively sensitive Doug MacRay, – maybe too comfortable. It almost seemed as if he was playing himself.

Rebecca Hall was lovely as Claire, the fish out of water bank manager. She is not from Charlestown so she knows little about the neighborhood. This makes her seem fragile and naïve. She plays Claire lightly and poignantly but it is a quiet role and performance.

Jeremy Renner (previously in “The Hurt Locker” and “Dahmer”) played Jem, the most hot headed of the gang members. He was interesting to watch but was only used as a sinister foil to Doug. We only get brief bits of him in throughout movie.

All and all I would say the action scenes, the robberies and car chases were the stars of the film. The film comes alive during those scenes.

Yay or Nay

I would say ‘Yay’. “The Town” blends fast paced action scenes and heists, with an uncomfortable romance and the story of a troubled man coming to realize he wants more out of life than robbery. I can’t think of anything major that I didn’t like about the movie other that the Boston accents were hard to understand at times. I suppose I would have liked a more in-depth look at the ‘town’ and also the characters and how the town influenced them while they were growing up; this was only hinted at in the movie.

Overall, I liked “The Town” and found it satisfying. It is a good movie but did not blow me away. It is kind of like a meatloaf and mashed potato dinner – a solid, tasty, filling meal but not something I would rave about. My criteria for a good movie – would I see it again? Yes I would but only if I was in the mood for meatloaf.

References

http://www.imdb.com/

http://thetownmovie.warnerbros.com

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charlestown,_Boston

Rough Time

Ok, I am exercising. I have been for a few weeks now. I had a good workout today so when does the shrinking begin? It isn’t as easy as watching a time lapsed video of my shrinking fat ass. Ugh. Next I suppose I have to address my eating habits. It is rough.  

I know I eat too much to battle my almost constant fatigue. Eating used to help to stay awake and study/work on homework. It isn't working for me anymore. I also know I am somewhat of a glutton - I love good food and also get powerful cravings. If the food is good and something I really want I often think about a second helping before I am done with the first, not feeling that the portion I have in front of me is enough. That is scary. It feels like an addiction. 

I never thought much about emotional eating - it just didn't seem to fit me. Until today. I went to see my counselor today and it was a difficult session. First of all she asked me if I was proud of myself because I have been working out. Should I be? I don't really feel proud. That made me sad. I know I have more stuff to address - this eating. Then we talked about the past when I had been depressed before and the reasons why. It was horrible thinking about past incidents that made me depressed, that changed everything for me. For one thing I thought I had dealt with these issues, I thought I was over it but the pain is still there. This made me feel so terrible. I felt like I had been ripped open, exposed. When I feel like this it is almost a physical feeling - the emotional pain feels like a gaping hole in my abdomen. After I left my counselors office I was about ready to forget everything and run away or something, escape from myself. It was that bad.

I determined I had to go on so I went to lunch. I thought about my pain, my depression as I stuffed my face, the first plate not making me feel any better. I realized my weight loss journey is not as easy as exercise, eat right and lose weight. It isn't that simple for me. Attempting to lose weight, to take off these pounds means also taking off years and years of depression. It isn't going to come off easy, it isn't going to be easy. Then my mood lifted from the lowest low to reasonably happy as I took a bite of sweet banana creme pie. In that moment I realized just how happy food makes me - I am an emotional eater. I use food to mask my unhappiness, to self-medicate. Oh, this isn't going to be easy at all.

Weight Loss Transformation

This girl is brave! Posting pictures of her weight loss transformation. Inspirational! I am always looking for inspiration. I wish I was brave enough to do something like this.






http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y70tbJ0WLh4

Writing takes the place of food?

I just discovered something else while writing my previous blog. I was so into writing it, trying to make it right that I missed half my lunch time and I didn't even feel hungry. I was in the zone. I wish time stopped, it certainly felt like it.

Can writing take the place of eating? It would seem so, at least for today. Well ... I want to eat now, dammit! I was planning on going over to the buffet to overeat but I may just have to grab something quick. But quick eating can be unhealthy and lead to overeating too. UGH. I really need to start packing a lunch. Once I get this exercise think down I really need to address my eating habits.

I fail...

Well I must admit that I did not work out yesterday. I stayed at home presumably to get some writing done. I failed at that too and basically goofed off for a good part of the day. Don't you hate it when you are unfocused and unmotivated?

I did miss working out though and I started getting antsy in the afternoon, wanting to get in some kind of work out. I wanted to get on the wii but I procrastinated and had to get ready to go to my internship. By the time I got home around 10pm I was pretty well wore out.

I guess the good thing about it is that I missed working out – I wanted to work out. I didn’t think it would have that much of an impact on me but it seems to. Now I just need to figure out why I didn’t just do it. It almost seems like I punished myself or I am playing games with my own head. That is weird.

OK, let me break it down.

Part of why I didn’t work out  is I truly have a lot of writing I need to do, some I even want to do =) and I felt like I would get some done yesterday. It sucks that I didn't because I have been behind on a lot of stuff (reading and writing) since the beginning of the semester and really wanted to get caught up and if I would have been on the ball yesterday, I could have. I have been stressed over this. I really messed up and got distracted by the internet, cleaning up some messiness around the house, and the TV. That sucks. Part me argues that I needed a day just to veg out, relax, but part of me is kicking myself. I was pretty anxious yesterday too, about not getting much of anything done, so I really didn’t relax. It was a wasted day.

Another reason why I didn't go or press the issue is I was half conscious of some thoughts I was having about monitoring myself. Could motivate myself to go without the pressure of someone waiting for me to show up? How would I feel if I didn't go? Would I miss working out? Would I feel guilty if I didn't go? I was trying to analyze myself, ha.

Then there is just plain laziness and I was tired as always.

The positive aspect of all this is that I realized I missed working out. Yeah I know I said that earlier (was it twice already?) but I think that is a big deal for me – I didn’t think I would. I didn’t feel guilty either, I just missed the activity and I had a desire for it. Working out is becoming valuable to me. Bottom line is I just need to do it. Stay out of my head, and just do it. The more I work out more I want to do it. It is funny that I just realized that simple concept - people have been telling me that for years. I am finally getting it. It's a damn miracle!

Flowers always make me feel better, more positive.

Still Workin' Out

I went and worked out at the Rec. Center today even though I wasn't really feeling it. I had been up until after 4am last night, trying to get a paper done. I was tired.

I got on the treadmill first thing and kept thinking "Ugh, I don't want to be here." I pushed myself though and made it through 20+ minutes on the treadmill. Then my exercise buddy and I went and worked out on the machines. The Rec. Center was a pretty happening place today - busier than the past few times we had been there. We still managed to get in a good work out though, and I started feeling better about being there. I guess I was waking up. I am getting more and more comfortable with the machines and how to adjust everything so I get a good work out. Melanie, my exercise buddy, noticed that a lot of the machines had smaller 5 pound weights that can be adjusted so you can have just a little more or little less weight. She is a lot smarter about the exercise machines than me =) That's a good thing because sometimes the lowest weight isn't enough and the next one up isn't enough.

Now my challenge will be to on Wednesday when I will be by myself because Melanie can't make it. I have to keep going. Plus sometime soon I want to get on my wii and weigh myself. Not that I will publish my weight - heck NO! But I would like to start monitoring my progress.

Obesity's hidden job costs: $73 billion

Productivity drops, sick days go up as BMI rises, new study find

By Stephanie Pappas

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/39571973/ns/health-diet_and_nutrition

Token Video of the Week

Here is the token video of the week in case I can't come up with anything else by tonight.

How to Win the Lottery

We could all use this info, right? If I won the lottery, besides paying off my student loans and buying beach property, I would hire a personal trainer and chef to help me whip my ass into shape. Once I get in shape, y'all know I am going to need a full body lift. j/k on that.




http://www.bing.com/videos/watch/video/how-to-win-the-lottery/1iojy4fx8?rs=lottery&from=en-us_msnhp&form=msnhed&gt1=42007

Something Positive

I have something positive to report – I started working out! I have worked out 3 days this week.


Last Thursday a classmate approached me and asked if I was writing the Fighting Weight blog. I said I was and she asked me if I wanted to work out. I said yes before I had a chance to think about it much and come up with a million excuses why I couldn’t. We figured out that we could work out together Monday and Wednesday mornings, and sometimes Fridays if I don’t work. So we started this week at the University Recreation Center.


Does everyone know that if you are a student at UM-Flint, you pay for a membership to the Recreation Center with your tuition?
http://www.umflint.edu/reccenter/

Monday morning I was stressing about working out. I had a ton of things to do and didn’t really want to devote time to exercise but I didn’t want to let down my new work out partner. Plus I was tired as usual. I went and it did feel good to be making a move in the right direction toward my goal.

Our routine is to do an aerobic activity, like ride on the stationary bike or walk on the treadmill, then go to the weight room and use the machines there. It was good to have someone there to talk to and figure out the exercise equipment with. My two big hang ups about exercising are lack of follow through (procrastination) toward my goals and feeling stupid about not knowing how to work the equipment. Having someone count on me to be at the Rec. Center, and just someone being there with me (someone I can laugh with over my stupidity about exercise machines) takes care of these two quite nicely. I left the Rec. Center that day feeling pretty positive and my energy level was up. I hope we both benefit from this and motivate each other. My work out partner was doubtful about coming back on Wednesday because she might be too sore but I said we should come back if just to walk around the indoor track.

We worked out Wednesday too. I wasn’t too sore from Monday but I was feeling it more on Wednesday than I did the day before so I was moving slow. I found it somewhat easier (less stressful) to go to the Rec. Center on Wednesday. I wanted to get that energy burst but the damn exercise bike was hurting my butt. I pushed on though. We did our aerobic workout and then worked out on some machines. Fire drills cut our work out short that day but I think we still got in a pretty good work out. Hey, at least we are trying.

I didn’t really feel like going this morning because I was super tired (I had to drive to Lansing and back in this morning), my sinuses were jacked up and I was moving slow, BUT since I wasn’t working, I decided I had to go and exercise. That was the deal and I have to keep this going! We got a really good work out today – about 2 hours. The machines seem to be getting easier to use which is good because the more comfortable I feel about using them the less likely it will be that I will be scared away from working out. We decided to try to play racquetball next week. It looks like fun and it is supposed to be a good work out. Something to look forward to.

Overall I am feeling pretty proud of myself and I am so happy that my new work out buddy was brave enough to approach me about working out. I definitely wouldn’t have started exercising this week if not for her. So far I like exercising – I feel a little better, if not physically all the time, I feel a bit better mentally. I am feeling a little healthier. Energy wise I am hoping for more. I get a little burst of energy immediately after working out but I don’t feel it later in the day. I might have to incorporate some exercise into my evenings too.

The iconic Rosie the Riveter

More funny stuff...

I should start doing a blog post each week called the token video, ha.
This one is not very motivational but it is kind of funny (not the funiest Chris Farley sketch but I'm trying to stay on topic) and has people exercising. I love it when the fitness instructor says, "Look at me! I'm thin, I'm handsome, I could have sex with anyone in this room!" Something to aspire to. J/K


Matt Foley Motivational Speaker and Fitness Trainer

Gary Glynn | MySpace Video

Keep on trying...

Ugh! I fell off the blog wagon. I have yet to get on the wagon toward my weight loss goals. I just have not been feeling good this fall and it makes it hard for me to keep up with everything, let alone start something new like an exercise program. I hate to come on here and make excuses but the sad fact of the matter is I have not done any work toward my goal of losing weight/getting healthier other than just thinking about things. That really is all I have had time and energy to do.

Things I have been thinking about or my main problems:

Eating – I eat to stay awake. I have been so tired lately that I am always eating. If I don’t eat I fall asleep. That is so frustrating because I don’t want to eat constantly. Plus I don’t go for healthy snacks, I go for junk food. I should trade the junk for carrot sticks or something. I wonder if healthy snacks would keep me awake and make me feel satisfied? Something I have never tried. I have just thought of this - The eating for energy is not working as well as it used to either. I used to be able to eat something, drink some tea, and feel better for a couple of hours at least. Now, as soon as I stop eating I am sleepy.

Lack of energy – I have no idea how to bring my energy level up. I am in class or working an internship about 8 hours Monday through Thursday – by the time I get home I am so tired I crash. I have yet to try my counselor’s advice and take a walk when I get home to get some energy. I am just too tired, too anxious about not feeling well all the time, and too stressed about all the stuff I still have to do that I get crabby and say ‘screw it’ (in harsher terms actually) and just veg out. Most times I end up falling asleep when I try to relax and get a grip on things. It is like I have to keep moving and keep eating but I am just not up for it. Week-ends I work, and try to catch up on everything but there is only so much time in the day, and so much you can fit in.

Exercise – does exercise really give you more energy? This has never worked for me but I don’t stick to an exercise plan long enough, maybe. How can you exercise when you feel like crap to begin with? People talk about getting a boost of energy but this has never happened to me. I am just tired, tired, tired. And doubtful.

So I am trying to get back on track this week-end. I am trying to overcome all these problems, excuses, doubts. Used to be I could just will-power through times when I felt this bad but it has been getting harder to do this fall. I feel pretty weak but I am going to keep on trying.

Because I need motivation and something funny: